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Communication is the principal building block of any relationship, but communication isn't just about expressing a thought. It's also about understanding what your partner is saying and conveying, back to them, that you understand. Remember, every person has an inner need to be heard and understood.

Understanding alone will not resolve gender differences. Men and women also need to develop skills appropriate for effective communication and understanding. An excellent resource in this is John Gray's best-selling book Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus. Gray outlines 10 common complaints that are easily misinterpreted, and why men pull away when women get too close, the secret reasons why men and women argue, and how to communicate difficult feelings.

As you seek to better understand and communicate with the opposite sex, whether it be in the boardroom, the bedroom or bistro, try these helpful suggestions:

1. Listen carefully to what is being said. Pay attention to how it is said. Try to empathise with the other person and hear the total communication (both verbal and nonverbal). This will give you a great chance to connect with the feeling and the meaning behind the words being expressed.

2. Listen with your mouth shut. In other words, don't interrupt the other person until you have heard all the story. Give the other person time to make themselves clearly understood.

3. Before responding, check out with the other person what you heard them say. This will help you to clarify whether you really heard and understood what they said, and how they feel about what they said. Don't assume you received their message. Check it out before jumping to any conclusions.

4. When you give your response, be clear, honest and concise about what you think, feel or want. Be aware, however, that being totally honest can sometimes be destructive to a relationship.

5. Remain open to further dialogue as you both seek to arrive at a clear understanding and appreciation of what it is you both want, need or agree to do. You may even profit from asking the other person something like, "What do you want from me?"

6. Recognise and "celebrate" your differences. Don't let them become a barrier to your understanding each other or an obstacle to intimacy.

7. Be committed to helping each other learn the skill of effective communication. Model good relational skills and you will enhance your understanding of each other, and help the relationship to grow stronger.

We are all demanding people, we demand the best food, best clothes, best education, best housing, best medical services, everything best. It goes the same for choosing a marriage partner; we have many expectations to demand for.

Afterall, we are getting a partner for life, unless you plan to split if you are unsatisfied with your partner. Well, nobody plans to split, but modern people won’t hesitate to seek a divorce once the marriage turns sour.

Now, we did some surveys during our events and here are some common criteria that both men and women are looking for:
- Chemistry
- Communication
- Similar interests and hobbies
- Same values
- Religion
- Easy-going and friendly
- Pleasant looking

We were actually hoping that people would openly tell us that looks are important, but surprisingly nobody did. The nearest answer was “pleasant looking” which has something got to do with looks.

Anyway, it is generally agreed that appearance (face, body shape) matters, else why would the beauty industry flourish? It is also generally agreed that men are more visually stimulated, whereas ladies go for emotional bonding.

So to all single people out there, have a thought over what is important when it comes to finding a lifelong partner.

Have you been asked "Would you marry for money?" ?? Maybe you have not met a wealthy guy or gal at this point of time? But with so many millionaires made from en-bloc sales, it is not uncommon to find a wealthy catch. So give this question a thought.  

Below is the results of our poll so far, if you had not voted, please do so on the left-hand column under the Main Menu. Or you may wish to follow up with your own comments here.